Death, is only the beginning...

Sunday, December 06, 2009

*pick up microphone*
“Ladies and gentleman, Step right up for an amazing show is about to begin”
“if you may please stay tuned for a Once in a life time show, which is not to be missed by any chance”
*drop microphone on the floor*

Now I gotten your attention, *smile*
I have been busy recently. So much has happened and so much stuff to settle.

on Friday night at 12am(midnight) ma, me, chin and xy went to surprise our birthday princess with a big surprise. Which she was so surprise that she didn’t know what to say(plus we know u are a sucker for surprises) we went over to her house and when it was midnight, I called her up even though her sister told me she was in the toilet I told her sister to Make sure she has to open the door immediately as I got a DHL person who would be there in a minute time as there is a package for her which she need to Receive it personally. We lighted the candles on the cake and was waiting infront of her house door, And when I was in front of the door I immediately cover the peep hole to see who was outside her house as I know the first things she will check is through the viewfinder to see who was it. Thus it was a surprise I can’t let her know that it was US outside. When she open the door we laughed like crazy at her reaction and started singing her birthday song.
We then started to Say “WE ARE THE FIRST to wish you happy birthday!!!”
this kind of surprise will only be done on special occasion, we have ignore the whole thing pretending we forget it is her birthday and she never expect us to be there in front of her doorsteps . As she only expects us to text her wishes.
It was super duper funny that night.
After I got back home I have to wake up in another 4 hours for my event.

I woke up feel ok, the event was not bad.
I would say it was really nice seeing how those primary 1 ongoing kids were so happy with simple things. The only headache thing is having them running about and screaming and stuff.
After the event I came back home Feeling very very uncomfortable. And I had other plans that night it was to go East Coast Park for a friend’s birthday party. I told my mom that I will rest first and see would I be able to go for that party as my decision to go was last minute, sort of an surprise to my other friend as I told her I won’t be able to attend this party.
When I woke up at 6pm or 7pm by my dad my body was still burning up and I feel very uneasy as I was down with a fever.
So yes I was down with a fever the whole night and feeling uncomfortable. I didn’t mind that I was the only one at home as my folks were worried leaving me at home all alone. But for me I won’t be doing anything except eat my meds and sleep.

This morning I woke up and my folks ask me to go out with them. I decline it again as I feel I might get sick again. And now I think I might be sick again, my body is starting to be feverish again.
And I feel lethargy again. I slept for 13 hrs I think.
Now what I hope is get well again. (This entire year I rarely fell ill thus I think this is the payback period before the yearend)

ps: i am still waiting for ppl to finish their exams then can go watch movies hahahaa
(please inform when it is over)

major duivel

-MajorDuivel faced death at 1:35 PM

Monday, November 30, 2009

A void empty space,
a dark place just like a black box,
what goes in doesn’t come out.
Even if something comes out it won’t be as useful as you expected
Surrounded by the pure darkness, where no matter how much you shouted your voice won’t be heard. No matter how hard you try to hear your sobs, as your felt the tears streaming down your tearing eyes, All you could hear was your faintly heartbeat in the background of this room. Once again you open your mouth to shout, but there wasn’t any sound coming out of it.
Sitting there in this empty room, a-waiting for the first ray of light to shine into this place to light it up with colors as this world is only dominated by one color.
When would the blinding light pierce through this place?
Before the light come shining through,
everything would be as it is………………......

Major duivel

-MajorDuivel faced death at 9:03 PM

Friday, November 13, 2009

For the past few days I couldn’t write anything as everything in my mind is blank.
When I see things nothing was streaming in my head except a blank wall. Every time when I tried to concentrate my cognitive mind to come up with something or at least something interesting but none of it came up except White smoke and blank walls.
So today, when I woke up feeling much better as I felt that finally my brain came back to me.

I met my first semester, first year facilitator, Kelly, at the coffee shop I didn’t notice her at first but suddenly I was like taking a double look at the group opposite me and then I realized it was her . It was nice of her to come over to chit chat with me.

I left the coffee shop after my meal when an ongoing downpour was occurring and I had to get back home to take a umbrella. As my mom send me to do an errand and I was not in the mood to drive but rather in the mood to walk there.
As I was walking with an umbrella under the rain it seems to smoothen my mood making me feel relax as the cool droplets splashes again my skin, with that constant rattling sounds on my umbrella. It was like music was playing through my ears.
And during that slow stroll in the rain then I realized that I like being alone. when i'm in that kind of state my mind is filled with words, images and thoughts.

Weirdly, a couple of days ago I was walking under the rain with a friend but nothing of such calmness came to me everything was blackout for me. Guess it only works when I am alone and my body had enough rest.

During the walk I start to notice things like I never usually notice, like what is it like when it rains and I just got out of school when I was in primary school. And seeing all those kids running in the rain make me missed those days where everything looks so big and beautiful. Now everything I seen is bleak and insignificant, I heard them laughing and playing it made me smile a little.

I guess I was in a very good mood during that time.

I watch Jennifer’s body with von and André. I would say we had great fun together except for dinner the meal in food court was Horrible that we ate half of it as we don’t want to waste our money and Ran to eat at MacDonald’s for a 2nd round. I never ate like this for a long time and somehow I won’t eat like that anymore. This type of binging is not good for me I tried so hard to cut down on eating so I wont want to binge again LOL.
Now I am sleepy, I shall go catch up on my sleep.

Waiting for the petals to fall off, to know what is await in front or what type of installment has been planned,

Major Duivel

-MajorDuivel faced death at 12:28 AM

Friday, November 06, 2009

Sigh~~ I am hopelessly useless in a way.
I think I only know how to spend my parent’s money.
I think when I am not doing productive things such as studying for test or exams or something useful. I am wasting time and my parent’s money as I would want to hang out and when I do that I would be spending their money. I usually don’t ask my folks for stuff even though sometimes I do have want like things I really want and things I would need. But often I would have a want list and kept it away from my folks as they would have a massive headache if they see that.

I had learnt how to separate wants and needs when I was young as my family wasn’t very well to do in the first place. Thus I always think a lot on something before I buy it. Even now I am still thinking so hardly on the DSLR. On top of that is my Thailand trip. ROFL.. It’s seems I am spending money again somehow it seems that way. So people would say I should work. But the fact is I am working for my dad somehow semi-part time and I don’t really get paid as my dad would tell me this : “since when, when you ask for money I said no?” This always makes me pause in my tracks and say ‘he is right about that’ whenever I ask my dad for money he would give me without second thoughts. (But I didn’t ask for big amount like give me $200)

Hm… yawn…. I am so sleepy now.
I think I maybe down with a cold.
caught in the rain abit yesterday. (slight note to my friends who like to travel, tiger airway is having the early bird savers again so 1 dollar flight is back hahaa..)

MAJor duivel

-MajorDuivel faced death at 2:44 PM

Tuesday, November 03, 2009

Recently it had been raining. It would be all warm, hot and humid and the next min it would be pouring rain so badly. My thai friend is staying in my house, it is really nice we all are like a big family. *chuckle* it seems like my parents had a daughter whom was being kidnapped to Thailand. This thai friend of mine had become a family friend not only that our families are like all close together, Like if I were to go Thailand I would be treated very well too when I am staying at her auntie’s place.
My friend had no interest in shopping in Singapore as the things here are expensive so I have brought her around to take photos of Singapore. I kind of had a crash course lesson learning things from her using a DSLR. She owns a canon D350 and I learn some basic from her. So it is good and I am kind of itching to buy my NIKON now… and she is here she can guide me on what I should get and what is bad and what is good. So I have someone I trust on advising me.

I received news that my temple is organizing Thailand trip and I told my friend that if I were to go Thailand which is Bangkok and I would extend my stay as my folks would only be there for 3 days. Lol…. 3 days is not enough for me in bkk.
NIKON D90 would you be mine?? ROFL………………. Going nuts thinking of it…

Ps: Jess if u see this, would you be free on 9th nov for lunch haha want to have lunch together?(in rp) (if u didnt reply me then i guess i must sms you soon)

Sleepy MAJor Duivel

-MajorDuivel faced death at 12:30 AM

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

My mind is all clouded,
my vision is all blur,
my body is all fatigue,
my life is all in pieces,
what I need now, is what I always wanted.
When will I be able to obtain it?
when would I be able to sit at a cool place, with the nice breeze blowing at my face and my mind would just be blank and just enjoy what I’m having and the world around me is quiet.

Right now my brain is completely mashed up, I get rather moody when I don’t want it to be. Right now if you chat with me and the way I reply you it may sound that I am blunt or direct, but I may not be in a bad mood but I didn’t mean it that way. It is just my brain can register to make it all seems light and fun.
I guess my brain have reach it final period and it will just implode on me anytime. Currently I’m having a bad headache that I can’t even think straight. Like I am on drugs or something my mind is telling me to go sleep have some rest even my mind is filled with stuff that I need to do.

I am on the verge of taking a gun and pull the trigger on myself.

major mad duivel

-MajorDuivel faced death at 9:39 PM

Friday, October 23, 2009

Ok I am all ok now. haha...

After that post I think I got so much better.
How do I say it?
It’s like I finally put a closure on that chapter in my book of my life.
I am still pretty screwed up as my body clock is all over the place like when it suppose to be sleeping time at night I am all up awake playing game and cant sleep and when it is time for me to awake I am feeling all sleepy and tired.
Argh I need to hurry tune back my clock.

My friend from oversea is coming. Yeah…. Haha.. She is one lucky person I would be showing her some culture stuff.

Ok now I am 100% not awake I going off now.

I WANT TO WATCH PARANORMAL ACTIVITIES !!!!!!! But no one wants to go with me

major duivel

-MajorDuivel faced death at 3:46 PM