Death, is only the beginning...

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Ladies and Gentleman (if there is any or those who recognize themselves as gentleman’s) ,

14th November I started my day out by wishing one of my friends, whom it was her birthday, which it was something joyous. Which it seems like a normal day, but in the morning at 9+am I received a call from my mom that my grandma is in the hospital is her condition is critical and I have to go to the hospital to see her and I have to arrange the trip down with my brother.

after hearing that I went back to sleep as I was tired and sleepy as I have what I have to do the whole day running through my brain, like I am scheduling my day in my head. And also my grandmother have been in and out of hospital that I am aware of and not all the time I went to visit her as she pull out of the critical zone.
I went round doing what was on my schedule and first it was the bring mikey down for his morning walks and get myself ready to go see my SHifu(master) for my knee treatment. So in between of waiting for the time to go by faster as my appointment was 11am I quickly gave another 2 more uniforms vendors a call on the project and they both gave me their green lights which was something I felt happy about. Then my brother called me and told me he was on his way home as he told his officers that my grandma is in hospital and is critical they let him went back earlier and we had breakfast together and I went for my treatment.

after my treatment I went back home and complete my task I was suppose to complete and did some more calling of the uniform vendors. And my dad came home we rush to do some impt work stuff and my mom was all panicky that she was rushing to the hospital and we were also finishing up and doing what we must before we leave such as bringing mikey down for his evening walk and feed him first.

On the way to the hospital I keep asking my dad questions which I didn’t ask my mom earlier as on the phone she was all teary and it is hard to get answers from people who can’t calmly tell u finish a sentence . I mindlessly told my dad if grandma were to go I think it would be time’s up for her and it is also a good thing as she had suffered for a long time, it would be the only way to release her from her suffering.
On the way to TTSH which we are reaching novena the first call came, my mom crying badly. I felt my heart swelling about to tear a bit but I control and be cool and calm and tell my mom that we are on the way and is reaching soon. The 2nd time my mom called me we were in TTSH carpark parking the car and my mom told us to HURRRY my grandma cant hold on any longer we need to hurry. My dad and bro practically speed up in their pace and I was like trying to drag myself to move faster. When we found the lift(we were a bit lost as we are not sure how to get to the wards) my mom started Crying hysterically and mumble my grandma had left us. That makes us even more panic, I guess not because of my grandma but there is no one there with my mom except my uncles and aunties and cousin.

We rush like fuck to the wards lift and were stopped again to do registration my brother Burst out in anger and started Scolding people and he calm down when he saw my mom. The reason he have them my grandma is in a critical condition and is dying but she just pass on 2 mins ago but he wants to hurry up to go up to at least look at my grandma for the last time in the hospital even though we were 2 mins late. We rush into the ward and saw my grandma there with an ECG with no pulse except a single straight like with abit of disturbance causing by movement of the bed.
I was so dumbfound as I really didn’t know what to say as like what I know inside me when I was in my dad vehicle I was already prepared. But I didn’t expect that this preparation being condition over time with her in and out of the hospital was finally in use and I felt peaceful suddenly when I was in that ward except they constant of seeing my aunties crying their eyes out and I was trying to tell myself I shan’t cry as it is something good and it is not a bad thing.
I am not sad or unhappy but I guess too many things happen in one day and the next few days would be a tired one.

MY knee after treatment and all the walking abt in the hospital seems like it have defeat its purpose at one stage I was feeling the pain. Then I rested my knee and tomorrow I need to go back again for another set of treatment as I would have medication on. My right knee notice by my master is slightly bigger than my left not because it is swollen but the ligament had healed and had become thicker which is a normal thing.
I have so many things to do… I Hope I can complete the vendors tomorrow and pass to JAJA and be off the next few days doing nothing but staring into space accompanying my mom to the funeral.

Now how will I survive tomorrow’s service I hope I could. Haha with a bandage up knee
No worries ppl I am fine, dun need to console me if it is mikey THEN maybe u need to do it.

lastly i hope my grandma would go to a better place than this world. hope u would be happier at the otherside :)
Major duivel

-MajorDuivel faced death at 2:44 AM